The Ocean

I want someone that I can call the ocean. No fear that he will be gone when I look away. He will be there. He will always be there.

Where's my Ocean?

#1
Loved him. Fell for him during sweetsixteen and he didn't. Broke me. Cried terribly on my birthday after spending the entire day with him.
Reconciled 3 years later. He fell. I fell again. Broke me even harder. Someone I thought I'd never never cross pathways again in life crossed. Gave me hope. Destroyed me. And I literally handed him my heart on his hand and told him to go ahead and break it.
One that looked at me in the eye and tell me he likes me
One that hugged me tight enough to feel the inner warmth
One that was so near physically
but yet felt so so so far apart

#2
The biggest commitment.
One I toned down drinking, clubbing, social life for
One I sacrificed most for
One I cried most for
One that my parents and friends acknowledged
One that done me wrong the most
One that makes it so hard to love
they say, if you really love someone, love conquers all, you look pass his wrongs and live with him
And he, makes it so hard to love.
I look at him now and I just want to be friends. He makes it so hard to even befriend.

#3
Perfect.
No one is perfect. I don't know what is 10/10. But he is probably 9.
Our mind blends in together.
We share the same frequency.
We talk like there's like no tomorrow and he surprised me everyday with the fact that someone can be so alike as me
We had something so different.
It was nothing physical but all talk.
And first time in my life, words could mean so much.
I don't think I can ever find someone like him again..if I do, it will never be like him. I don't believe that you can find someone as alike as him in a lifetime. And humans can't help to make comparison. And there will always be a slight thing that makes me realize they're not the same.
I want that. I know I can never be with him. And that's just sad. Cause the reason is fucking distance. Isn't that sad?
I am logical but I don't wanna be
I understand but I don't wanna understand.
I would rather do long distance and have him.
The amazing bond I have with my best friend. Imagine that I found it in a male that I like. And we can't be together. What's with that?