Call me a loser

When it comes to feelings, I am this timid, I dare not feel, when I know I am feeling too much, I withdraw, I do the wrong things on purpose to make the other dislike me, to make the other withdraw, I am scared, right now, I am very scared. I love you. I do. I am so afraid. Because it's been almost a year since I last cried this bad for someone, the kind of trembling when you're crying, when you touch your chest and you can feel your heart breaking into pieces, and it continues breaking into smaller pieces, when you cry till you can't stop, when you can feel tears flowing down to your ears, when you think about how much you love him and it already hurts this bad now, you don't know what would happen if more feelings are involved, it hurts so bad but I really wish that when one day when you're ready for me, you'd come back chasing, cause I can assure you this. I'll be here. I will always be here.